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Anna Camp can't save "True Blood"

HBO's "" started out as a great show, as the vampire stories and cable TV sex scenes made it one of the hottest shows on television. But the show has slipped over the years, even if it still commands a decent audience. HBO has announced that next year's seventh season will be its last, and frankly the show lost it long ago. It used to be a regular on but this year was left off again.

TV critic Laura DeMarco explains how the show has .

We love Anna Camp and were thrilled to see her character come back, but she's just not enough to carry the show.

Molly Lambert also chimed in about how . She appreciated the eye candy and all the sex scenes but the idiotic stories got to her.

So we'll see what happens in the final season. We know there will be plenty of sensual sex scenes to keep many viewers interested, but we can't expect much more than that.

True Blood Teaser

True Blood 3.12 - Sometimes, The Wrong Thing To Do Is The Right Thing

Season 3 of "True Blood" has come to a conclusion, and I've got to be honest with you: it couldn't have happened a moment too soon. Between having to blog both this show and "Mad Men" more or less live, I'd reached the point where I'd begun to Sunday nights...until I realized that, no, it wasn't so much that I was dreading Sunday nights as it was that I was dreading having to blog "True Blood."

But we'll get back to that.

Since I've already watched and written about the show, let's go ahead and just tackle the events of the season finale first, beginning, of course, at the beginning.

So Eric and The King are just, y'know, kinda hanging out in the parking lot and catching some rays, like good buds sometimes do...except, of course, that good buds don't tend to be handcuffed together (unless they've taken their friendship to a, uh, higher level), and being exposed to the rays in question means imminent death. In the case of The King, it's kind of a good-riddance-to-bad-rubbish situation, but for Eric's, it's definitely a case of suicide by sunshine. So is the spirit of Godric really visiting him, or is it just his rational mind trying to get his attention? Either way, Godic's pleas for Eric to forgive The King fall on deaf ears. Meanwhile, Sookie's running through the forest to catch something that looks like a cross between E.T.'s ship and a chandelier, but it turns out to be something like running toward the light, since she suddenly wakes up from what was apparently a dream and slaps the shit out of Bill for betraying her ...except that, really, he only pretended to betray her in order to save her . Yawn. As soon as she realizes that Eric's outside, sacrificing himself in order to rid the world of The King, she refuses to allow it, instead running outside and allowing The King to goad her into using her fairy powers to separate Eric and The King from each other. Rather than save them both, however, she slams The King against a wall, dragging Eric inside and leaving The King to burn...although, frankly, I don't know why she didn't do something to actively finish him off, given that he was continuing to threaten her even as she departed.

Oh, why: Sookie offers up her blood to save the day, and once Eric's in better shape, he announces that he wants to spare The King. Yeah, good plan: he sure talks and acts like he's really going to be sparing humanity when he gets released. Sookie sits around, reading Star Magazine and listening to The King rattle on with huge monetary bribes, but she's not letting him out of his chains. As a backup, he tries to make her feel paranoid about the value of her blood to Bill and the other vampires. She openly mocks him for believing that he can bring his lover back to life with her blood. Instead, she pours his remains down the sink and cranks up the garbage disposal. Ew.

Tara's watching Nan and Rev. Steve on the news as Sam whips up a bit of post-coital breakfast for them (mmmm...pancakes), but he's really only using the food to help ease her into accepting that he's a shapeshifter. I'll give her credit: it's about time someone called out the completely insane goings-on in the town. Indeed, she seems to be trying to work her way through PTSD. First, she decides to run home to her Mama, only to find that the Reverend has made a house call. I loved how Tara opened her comments to her mother by saying, "God knows I don't have any business judging anybody," but her mama has decided that she's found her calling: as a minister's wife...after, of course, the minister leaves his current wife. Tara clearly doesn't believe her mother is destined to find happiness, but she gives her best wishes and drives away.

Eventually, she makes her way back home, and there's a momentary thought that she might stab herself to death with a pair of scissors, but, no, she's just going to give herself a quick trim. After a brief heart-to-heart talk with Sookie, where the two friends rekindle their relationship, Tara hops in her car and heads off to parts unknown...or, at least, they'll be unknown 'til next season, anyway.

Jason, meanwhile, is trying to help save his girlfriend's family from being invaded by the DEA, his future career in law enforcement be damned, but her daddy isn't exactly what you'd call grateful. Once again, Jason turns out to possess a voice of reason, but he doesn't get a chance to convince him before her brother shoots Daddy in the head. He threatens everyone unless she leaves with him, but Jason keeps telling her to leave. She thinks the best of her brother, though, and she decides that Jason's the one who needs to take over for her father and keep her people safe. Time to step up to the plate, Jason! We never get to see what he does, though, aside from tipping the family to the upcoming assault and helping them find safety. Another "to be continued next season" moment, naturally. Maybe that's when we'll also finally see Sheriff Andy take a hit of vampire blood. Now that's something I'd like to see...

Hoyt's mother, ex-girlfriend, and, uh, the high school guidance counselor gang up with poor Hoyt at his work site, staging a vampire intervention. It's a waste of time, though: he loves Jessica, he's pissed off at his mother, and he knows the counselor keeps a stash of liquor in his desk. In the end, all it does is convince Hoyt that he really does want to spend his life with Jessica, so he goes off and buys a house, then promptly asks her to marry him. Clearly, they're not going to live happily ever after, since we also get to see Hoyt's mama stocking up on Rev. Steve-approved firearms, presumably to take Jessica down for the long haul. Also, what was that on the floor of Hoyt's new house? A doll...? I couldn't see it clearly enough to tell.

Lafayette's still having some serious vampire flashbacks - including one which, rather surprisingly, involved a momentary cameo from Michael Raymond James, reprising his role of Rene - which leads him to call Jesus in a panic. He manages to pull it together before returning to work, though, and when Jesus turns up, he reveals that he knows magic, resulting in Lafayette responding incredulously, "You're a witch who's a nurse who's a dude."

Sam tries to find out what's up with Tommy not answering his phone, and he finds his place in disarray, all the money gone, and - rather inexplicably - all signs pointing to a desperate attempt to get the place as cold as possible, with the A/C apparently cranked up and the refrigerator door open. What's about? Oh, well, it doesn't matter, because Sam heads back over to Merlotte's, finds that Brother Dearest has swiped the money from there, too, and hits the road to find Tommy. He eventually does, of course, and their last scene of the season ends with Sam firing his gun in Tommy's direction, though - shocker! - we don't know whether or not he actually shot .

Alcide - you may know him as Werewolf Boy - is back in the picture briefly, having returned to repay his father's debt by assisting in Bill's big plan, though he does manage to take time to flirt a little bit with Sookie. Bill's big plan, by the way, involves wrapping The King in silver, then encasing him in concrete. Not a bad idea. What I didn't expect, however, was for Bill to knock Eric flat and try to do the same to him, not to mention sending off someone to kill Pam as well. Thinking Eric no longer a viable concern, Bill turns up at Sookie's place, tells her that he's knocked off both The King and Eric. She's unsurprised about the former, but it's clear that she's horrified by the news of the latte. Bill swears it was something he had to do in order to keep her safe, which he assures her that he will do forever, even at the expense at his own life, saying, "I have never loved nor will I ever love as I have loved you." Cue Eric's appearance on the front doorstep, alive, well, and dripping wet concrete, in order to out Bill's sordid past.

So, wait, all you have to do to get a vampire out of your house is to rescind your invitation, at which point they go flying out the front door? Somehow, that seems too easy.

Time for the final wrap-up. TVampire Queen of Mississippi shows up, dressed to the nines in her best widow attire, thrilled to death about Russell's demise. She's waiting to indulge on Sookie's blood, but Bill informs her that she's fallen for his clever ruse, that he's instead planning to take her down, since he now has nothing left to lose. Cue the Matrix moment where they both leap into the air, then toward each other. Sookie, meanwhile, goes to the graveyard to commune with Gran, but she's told by the fairies that she's not alone, at which point she takes their hand, joins the light, and disappears with them.

And, so, another season of "True Blood" is behind us...and, frankly, I think it might well be the last one I'll be blogging for Bullz-Eye.

Don't get me wrong, I've been a fan of this show over the years and have certainly enjoyed a great deal of it, but this season just wasn't doing it for me, and the one moment that seemed like it was going to be an absolutely kick-ass game changer - The King ripping out a newscaster's heart on live TV - might as well have never happened for all the ultimate effect it seemed to have on the world at large. Instead, we got Jason and the Hill People, Sam's shape-changing family, Tara's PTSD, and a whole bunch of fucking fairies. There were entertaining moments in Season 3, yes, but Russell should've ruled the remainder of the season. Instead, he turned into a cross between Gollum and the Phantom of the Opera. As such, I can't call it anything other than a major disappointment to me.

What were thoughts?

True Blood 3.11 - "Be brave. We'll die together."

True Blood 3.10 - Once Evil, Always Evil

If I'm to be perfectly honest, this week is the first time since Season 3 began that I've been legitimately excited about tuning in for "True Blood." Granted, you have to take my position with a grain of salt, since I wasn't watching when episodes 3.7 and 3.8 originally aired, so I'm willing to admit that it's possible I could've had that feeling as a result of one of those. Even so, though, I'm willing to bet that just about who watched The King rip out the heart of that poor newscaster at the end last week's episode was desperately seeking an answer to the question, "What's going to happen ?"

I know certainly was.

It was therefore mildly disappointing to have the episode begin not with The King but, rather, with Bill finally revealing Sookie's true identity to her. Fortunately, Sookie's reaction served as an instant salve for the wound: "I'm a ? How fucking !" I think you'd have to say that Bill didn't exactly do the best possible job of playing up Sookie's ancestry, and things only got worse when he was forced to admit that her people were reportedly wiped out of existence by vampires, owing to fairy blood being magically delicious. He can't exactly confirm that the stories are true, but he can at least vouch for the awesomeness of Sookie's blood. This immediately makes her suspicious of why Bill's interested in her, but he swears up and down, "It's not your blood I love. I love you - your mind, your heart, your soul - and I will foreswear ever feeding on you again if that's what it takes to convince you of that." Aw, isn't he just the sweetest vampire?

After coming off as a total bad-ass at the end of last week's episode by killing Franklin with wooden bullets, all of Jason's bravado abruptly vanishes in a puff of PTSD as he flashes back to killing Eggs at the end of last season...and then to killing Eddie way back in Season 1, an event which I'd practically forgotten about. It's more than a little bit late for remorse, though, and Tara's clearly not asking him for have any, anyway. Together, the two of them make sure that there's nothing left of Franklin.

Lafayette and Jesus are trying their best to help get Crystal's dad someplace where they can get him medical attention, while Sam's chugging whiskey and seems to have a flurry of feelings running through his head...including his flashback, which shows a side of him we've never seen nor even imagined. It never occurred to me that he'd used his great powers with great irresponsibility, but I reckon he got what he deserved, now, didn't he? As we learn over the course of the episode, Sam's past is much darker than we'd heretofore known about. Clearly, he's not a man to be trifled with...and never has been. Meanwhile, Lafayette's stock of vampire blood serves to save Crystal's daddy, but he's not exactly grateful for their efforts, and he's still pissed off at his daughter for stepping outside of her own community...whatever that is. Jesus, however, is fascinated by the power of vamp blood. I'm not really a big fan of these moments where they try to parallel something from the real world - in this case, drug addiction - with something from the world of vampires. It always feels too heavy-handed to me, and this was no exception, coming across like a vampire-translated take on "Trainspotting" or "Requiem for a Dream."

All things considered, I don't think it's the worst plan in the world for Erik to be making sure his estate is in order, given that The King's first order of post-newsman-killing business is likely to take him down. Shame about how Erik's new dancer got screwed in the last will and testament, but I laughed out loud at the way the phrase "you gold-digging whore" was both in subtitles spoken in straight-up English.

When Bill turns on the TV, Ms. Flanagan is back on the news and, unsurprisingly, she's decrying The King's actions, likening him to Jeffrey Dahmer. Nice try, but I'm guessing it's not going to sway the tide of negative sentiment toward vampires but so much. Erik turns up, and he and Bill have one of their typically tense heart-to-heart chats, with Bill updating him on the effects of Sookie's blood and Erik offering a tsk-tsk at how disappointed Sophia's going to be. It quickly descends into a back-and-forth about Sookie, which is promptly interrupted by Sookie herself, who mouths off to Erik. In return, he offers a moment of surprising tenderness with his farewell to her, then vanishes into the night.

Hey, look, Rev. Steve is back! I guess all it took to bring him back to the forefront was The King's shenanigans on national TV. Naturally, Arlene is cheering him on, though she really should've known better than to mouth off in front of Jessica, who quickly takes her to task for her loudmouth manner. She's embarrassed, but Tommy thinks her actions are hot, which manages to embarrass her. Meanwhile, Hoyt's new girlfriend, Summer, is continuing to annoy the living hell out of him, but she's playing the sex card. Give him credit for maintaining restraint. (I'm not sure I could've been quite so strong if girlfriend had put my hand on her breast and basically said, "Take me, I'm yours.") When we next see Jessica, however, she's got a whole new problem to deal with...and, ohh, man, here's another real-world point of comparison: crosses being burned in vampires' front yards. That might even be more heavy-handed that Lafayette and Jesus's chemical-induced voyage through time. Thankfully, there's little focus on this event, and the next time we see Jessica, she's being handed the opportunity to get back together with Hoyt...and dismisses it. Ouch. Tommy sure as hell deserved the punch in the face he got from Hoyt, but, holy shit, I can't believe Tommy attacked him like that, especially since the end result was Hoyt and Jessica bonding like they've never bonded before.

Jason and Tara cross paths with Sookie and Bill, and to call it a tense encounter would be an understatement, with Tara's experiences with Franklin clearly having soured her on vampires. Specifically, she's blaming Bill for his refusal to assist her, but I think you could easily argue that she's more than within her right to be develop an anti-vamp stance at this stage of her life. For his part, Bill is putting his faith in Jason to protect the ladies in his absence...but that might be misplaced. At long last, Jason finally opens up to someone - his sister - about Eggs, who tells him that he really needs to be honest to Tara. She says he should be honest, and he says that she wouldn't know anything about honesty since she can already tell what everyone else is thinking. (Nice comeback.)

Things are pretty weird around Merlotte's in the wake of Sam's explosive behavior the previous night. He's pretty calm, but everyone else is walking on eggshells for fear of accidentally setting him off again. He claims to be fine, but is he? I reckon we'll soon find out. The scene with Terry and Arlene outside of the bar was hilarious up until the point where Arlene had to go and spoil the mood by telling him who the father of her baby was. Leave it to good ol' Terry to say just the right thing. What a guy.

When Erik turned up and Sookie was convinced it was a dream, I wasn't entirely convinced that that was the case. It was, of course, but I wouldn't put anything past that guy. After she jolted herself awake, the story switched to Jason, who delivered breakfast to Tara and tried to find the words to tell her about what he's done...and, shockingly, he wasn't very successful. Tara, however, thanked him profusely, thereby making him feel worse. (One thing: despite Tara's comment, I'm pretty Jason isn't just to be dumb.) After a kiss, though, he's jolted to his senses and finally tells her the truth. It goes over about as well as you'd expect...but, really, how could he possibly have expected anything else? I mean, that's like being surprised to discover that his sister has gone out on her own. Where's she gone? To see Erik, of course...and this time, it's no dream. There's a whole lot of kissin' going on at Fangtasia...but, hey, it's like she said: she's irresistible and intoxicating. Is Erik really picking Sookie over Pam? Surely not. And, yet, again, you never know with that guy.

Bill's royally pissed at Jason for letting Sookie out of his sight, but, frankly, Jason's a little pissed, too, and he's not afraid to lash out at Bill, officially rescinding his invitation to allow him inside the house. I'm not quite sure about the ins and outs of the whole vampires / invitations thing, but Jason's words clearly had an immediate effect on Bill, sending him hurtling out the door. But Jason's not alone: instead, he's got a blank panther in his room...a.k.a. Crystal. Oh, mama...

Remember how I said that it was mildly disappointing to have the episode kick off with Sookie rather than The King? Well, you can imagine how annoyed I was, then, to have His Majesty not actually make an appearance until the 49-minute mark of the proceedings. Looks like The King is busy shopping for a new boy toy, but all he's seeing is Talbot's ghost...which is darned unfortunate for the rent boy he's picked up, as he stabs the poor bastard. Vampire therapy is , man.

Things wrap up with Erik throwing Sookie over his shoulder, carrying her down to the basement of Fangtasia, and putting her in lockdown. I'm sure he'd say it was for her own good. Somehow, however, I don't think Bill's going to buy that...

True Blood 3.9 - Relax. It's Not Like You Killed Someone.

True Blood 3.8 - Making Up Is Hard To Do

This episode was one of the few in the series that didn't begin with a legitimate bang. Bill had just saved Sookie's life, and all that was left was Sookie's (screaming) reaction when she saw Bill again. Nobody in that hospital room was about to die, so after Sookie settled down and 'broke up' with Bill, life went on. Bill doesn't really explain why he went crazy on Sookie's blood, but she explains it away later (to Jason, I think) saying that Bill was near death and couldn't control himself. Um, okay.

This episode was written by Raelle Tucker (her 6th of the series) and directed by Lesli Linka Glatter, who is an experienced director but hadn't directed an episode of "True Blood" before. The show always has several balls in the air, but it felt especially scattered in this episode. It wasn't until the final 10 minutes that anything actually .

Everything else was just setup for that final sequence or for some episode down the line. For example, there was Arlene's vision of Rene, which literally had no impact on anything else that happened in the episode. I'm sure it was entirely necessary, but it only made the hour feel all the more frenetic, and not necessarily in a good way.

So let's hit the high points. To me, the most interesting storyline was Eric's continued infiltration of the King's trust. He was playing both Russell and Talbot in order to put himself into position to avenge his family's death. He had to flirt with Russell and get down and dirty with Talbot to get there, but he certainly got there, and it will be interesting to see what happens to him now that he's staked Talbot. It's not like he can blame it on someone else -- both Russell and the bodyguards knew that they were together that night.

Eric's actions essentially saved Bill's (and Sookie's, by proxy) life, because Russell felt Talbot's death and flew off into the night just as he was about to put Bill out of his misery. The fight at Sookie's house was intense, and she's lucky that Bill and Jessica (who just went through a combat training experience at Bill's house) showed up to help. When Jessica ran outside to chase one of the werewolves, Bill was left with the choice of following her or going upstairs to save Sookie, and he chose Jessica, possibly because he to, being her maker and all. Once Russell left, Bill went upstairs and he and Sookie made up in a big, big way.

Meanwhile, Jason's relationship with Crystal takes another turn when she shows up at his place soaking wet after running away from her betrothed. One can only assume she and her kin are werewolves, and Jason's confrontation with her father is only going to put him squarely in their cross hairs. But my main problem with the storyline is Crystal's assertion that she had never been out of Bon Temps -- if that's the case, how in the world did she not at some point cross paths with Jason Stackhouse? In a small town, that would seem to be entirely impossible.

Other than Sookie's flirtation with Alcide, everything else that happened this week seemed to be swirling about on the fringe -- Tara's strange recovery, Lafayette's mom and Jesus's arrival, Sam sending his own mom away, and Holly, the new waitress.

Taking a step back, I can see how some might compare the romantic triangle between Sookie, Bill and Alcide with what apparently goes on in "Twilight," but the books that "True Blood" were based on were published a full four years earlier. So, if anything, "Twilight" is a watered down version of "True Blood," not the other way around. (I'm not saying it is, I'm just saying that the "True Blood" story came first.)

Anyway, Will Harrris will be back at the keyboard next Sunday, so my time steering the ship has come to an end. Moving forward, while some have been critical of the third season, we have all the makings for a strong finish. (Namely, one crazy, pissed-off, 3000-year-old vampire.)

True Blood 3.7 -- A New Authority

True Blood 3.6 - Big Hat, No Cattle

Now that’s what I call an opening!

The King drags Sookie into the royal mansion as Lorena’s coming down the grand staircase, Eric and Talbot stroll in, and Bill – who’s kind of been bringing up the rear – is thrown to the floor and declared to be a traitor. Instead of giving up the ghost, though, Bill stakes the King’s bodyguard and attempts to take down His Majesty, too. It proves a laughable effort, however, as Bill is shunted upwards into the ceiling and then comes crashing down on the staircase. Ouch…but now we cue Eric, who steps in and immediately starts sucking up to the King, telling him he’d better hold on to this fine new filly he’s found himself.

Really, you can’t blame Sookie for her response: “Eric, what the fuck?”

There’s a whole lot of pissed-off people in the royal mansion: Talbot’s annoyed that the King isn’t giving him any say in what goes on in their homestead, and Lorena’s angry that Bill’s being sent to the slave quarters to be slain. I’d love to see a cat fight between Lorena and Sookie, I surely would. Lorena might want to wear Sookie’s ribcage as a hat, but I still wouldn’t count Sookie out of any such fight.

The clientele at Merlotte’s is far more discerning that I would’ve expected. Anyone asking the help how the peas are served in that place deserve whatever answer they get...or whatever they find their peas. Obviously, there's still some serious flirtation going on between Lafayette and Jesus, but we'll get back to that in a moment. First, we should have a laugh at the whole Arlene / Jessica plot thread. I laughed at just about every moment those two shared tonight, whether it was Jessica's fangs popping out when Arlene cut her finger, Arlene's completely horrified reaction (particularly her concern that her pregnancy made for an added temptation), or - most hilariously - Arlene's assurance that she takes garlic supplements. In the end, Jessica offered an olive branch of sorts by getting Curlers to offer up a tip before offering herself up as a snack...and, hey, nobody got killed! Looks like Jessica learned something from Pam after all...

Okay, back to the Lafayette / Jesus flirtation. Jesus talked about his past, and, amazingly Lafayette actually seemed to be falling for him, though he clearly was taken aback by the concept of taking it slow. Things looked like they were getting pretty sweet between them...and then, a little later, they suddenly weren't. Oh, sure, they did double-team the hillbillies like they were Jean Claude Van Damme and Dennis Rodman, but as soon as Jesus learned that Lafayette was a dealer, things went south in a hurry. This, of course, begs the question as to whether or not Lafayette cares enough about Jesus to consider trying to get out of the game...and if Eric will let him do so.

I still don't know what to make of Jason's new lady friend. They're still making out hot and heavy, but it struck me as more than a little ominous when he observed how warm she was, and when she started crying about how she just wanted a taste of something that she'd remember forever and soon started sniffing the air...? To borrow a line from Wire, there's something strange going on tonight, and it's not quite right. But I laughed when she ran off, saying, "Just forget me." Boy, you really don't know this guy, do you? The next thing you know, he's at her doorstep with a big bouquet of flowers and...pardon me while I snicker...wearing his high school letterman's jacket to impress her. Still, you had to feel bad for Jason when her fiancee answered the door and, when he called for her, her reaction was to claim that she'd never seen him before. So, of course, Jason being Jason, he has to get his annoyance about the situation out of his system by smacking around his current high school equivalent...and while he's trying to bang his sweetheart. That's just not cool, man.

“My patience is not without its limits,” says the King to Sookie, taking her to his den and, after lighting a fire for proper dramatic effect, entering into a Q&A session with her. It didn't start out that way, of course, but he's bemused by a certain extent, anyway. It's an educational conversation, though, with the King making her question her humanity with his comments about her powers, question Bill's motives by revealing the file that he's been keeping on her family. She tries to be as honest as possible, but he's not fucking around: he wants to know the deal with her powers. He clearly believes her when she says she doesn't know, later giving her a tsk-tsk and sighing, “Oh, sweetheart, you really don’t know anything at all, do you?”

As usual with Lorena, I find myself leaning toward the concept of "if you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all." The sequences with her and Bill were, to be blunt, fucking disgusting. I mean, she cuts him down the middle of his chest, cuts her own fingers, intermingles their blood, and then goes on to flay him. Bill comments that he would've liked to have seen her before the darkness set in, and I think he meant it, but it's far too late for her to turn back at this point. The grotesquery continues, and when the redneck werewolves entered the picture...ugh. Just...ugh.

Tara and Franklin are still sittin’ in a tree, occasionally k-i-s-s-i-n-g, but mostly Tara's just scared out of her ever-loving mind...and, frankly, she's getting much worse at hiding her emotions. Franklin doesn't seem to care, though. He's crazy in love with her...emphasis on the crazy. Still, she's trying her best to manipulate him and his silk pyjamas, and she seems to really make the most out of his request of her to bite him. Time to adapt the Blondie song to "Rip to Shreds," methinks. I have to admit that I didn't expect her attempt to bash in his skull to succeed...and since she didn't actually stake him, I feel certain that we'll see him again before long...but you can't say she didn't make the most of the opportunity provided to her.

I liked the conversation between Eric and the King in the car, with Eric discussing his hatred of werewolves and the King explaining how he uses them by giving them the blood, followed by the King reminiscing about the good ol’ days, talking about how Hitler was right: there is a master race, it’s just not the humans. It isn't long before they've arrived at their destination: the Queen's pad. How sad was it to see her scratching lottery tickets in a desperate attempt to get her fortune back? I feel as though Talbot would be less than thrilled to learn of the King's marriage proposal to the Queen, but it's clear that this would be a marriage of convenience, anyway, given the way he sneered those disparaging comments about her royalty. I knew Eric would jump into the conversation before too long, and so he did, apparently surprising the King with the depth of his threats to the Queen.

I still have no real idea what to make of the storyline with Sam's family, but I always enjoy seeing the news shows in the background, so it was nice that they let the focus settle on this one for a few minutes. I'm skeptical at Tommy's claims that he's not scared of his daddy, but when Mama showed up with her homemade corn fritters and Sam took 'em off to Merlotte's, it was certainly an intriguing conversation about Daddy dearest that also served to reveal that Mama isn't nearly as big a fan of Sam as we'd been led to believe. I was afraid that was going to prove to be the case. Sad to see I was on the right track. So you'll forgive me if I was getting a bit sleepy toward the end of the episode, I right in my suspicion that Sam thinks that Tommy's involved as a contestant in the dog fights? That's some crazy stuff, man.

So things wrapped up tonight with Sookie narrowly avoiding the redneck werewolves, Tara crossing paths with Alcide, and Sookie finding Bill, proclaiming her love, and then getting her ass thrown against the wall by Lorena. We'll see what happens next week, but since I think it's fair to say that Sookie isn't dead, it's not quite as rough a cliffhanger as it might have otherwise been.

True Blood 3.5 - Where's Your Badge? Where's Your Gun? Where's Your Shirt?

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