Dressing right for winter warmth
11/20/2001
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"Damn it's cold out here. I'm freezing my ass off!" If I had a nickel for every time I heard that, I would have moved to a warmer climate a long, long time ago. But the fact of the matter is that, whether through evolution or environment, we humans have become candy-asses. We get cold easily, and when we do, we whine about it. And the whole world hates a whiner.
First, the bad news: you have absolutely no control over this planet's weather. It's going to rain, snow, sleet and hail on you, whether you like it or not. Sometimes, you might get all four at once!
Now, for the good news: you do have total control over a tiny little portion of the weather -- namely, the few inches surrounding your own body, also known as your "microclimate." Basically, this can be defined as the bubble of air you walk around in. If you really want to withstand the worst of winter weather, you can manage your microclimate with proper apparel choices.
Just in time for the snow to fly, we're going to examine some of the most common causes of outdoor winter misery, and some possible solutions that will keep you warm and dry. Then we're going to look at some of this year's new cold-weather gear, and separate the Bull's Choice from the bullshit...
Problem #1 -- I'm freezing my grapes off!
This is a pretty good place to start, even if it does leave a lot open to interpretation. Staying comfortable in freezing temperatures (and below) requires two things: dryness and insulation. These are equally important partners in the comfort equation, and one doesn't do you a damn bit of good without the other.
Let's start with staying dry. Without going into the thermodynamics of the whole thing, you already know how water can affect body temperature. Evaporation is a great thing on a hot day -- your body uses sweat to cool itself, and a dip in the pool will cool you off through the same basic process. But on a cold day, the mechanism that cooled you off in the summer can make you miserable.
The key to staying dry is to know your enemy, and in this case, your enemy is cotton. The great thing about cotton is how well it absorbs water. Great for a bath towel, terrible for winter clothing. Cotton clothing will hold moisture near your body, causing your temperature to plummet. The phrase most commonly used as a reminder among climbers and outdoorsmen is "cotton kills." Whether you're climbing Denali or shoveling your driveway, you should heed this advice and leave the old college sweatshirts in the closet.
Wear a good base layer (i.e. thermal underwear) made from synthetic fibers like polypropylene or microfiber (both fancy names for polyester, which is really just a fancy name for plastic). Synthetics will move moisture away from your body through a process called "wicking," allowing sweat to pass through your clothing and into the air, keeping you as dry as Ben Affleck (this week, anyway).
The insulation part of the equation is easy. Insulation equals trapped air. The more air you trap close to your body, the warmer you'll be. Generally speaking, the thicker your insulation, the more air it holds. This is called "loft" (not to be confused with that little bar in Kent, Ohio by the same name that has kick-ass pizza for three bucks!). Cover your base layer with a good insulation like fleece or wool. In extreme conditions, consider insulation with higher loft, like goose down or quilted synthetics. Oh, and did I mention that cotton is bad?
The final piece of the puzzle is your "shell." The shell is the outermost garment, designed to protect the rest of the system from the twin pestilence of wind and water. To be effective, your shell garment needs to do two things: repel moisture, and breathe. This is accomplished through the use of any of a number of waterproof/breathable fabrics, the most well-known of which is Gore-Tex.
While there are literally dozens of different waterproof/breathables on the market, they all work in basically the same way: a porous membrane is laminated to a high-quality nylon fabric. The pores in the membrane are too small to allow water droplets to pass through, hence the garment is waterproof. However, the pores are large enough for water vapor (i.e. perspiration) to pass through, so it is also breathable. High-tech stuff, to be sure.
As a side note, and in case you need some useless knowledge for a party game, Gore-Tex is actually applied to a fabric backing, and the fabric is made into the desired garment. You can't see it, you can't touch it, but rest assured that it's in there working! And if you really want your friends to think you're a savant, tell them that Gore-Tex is actually the trade name for "expanded polytetrafluoroethylene", or EPTFE. It's basically the same stuff that makes your Teflon pans so slippery, just in a different form. You geek.
Problem #2 -- My feet are wet. And cold!
No matter how well some people bundle up, they always seem to neglect their feet. Why, may I ask, would you spend so much time keeping your entire body warm, only to neglect the one part that's in direct contact with water, snow and ice (not to mention the occasional urine splash if you're tailgating). When it comes down to it, your feet are no different than any other part of your body... they're just uglier. Keeping them warm is all about keeping them dry.
Working from the inside out, your choice of sock is critical. Did I mention yet that cotton is bad? Well, it's twice as bad in a sock. Any sock you wear in a cold environment must be able to wick moisture. Cotton will hold a quart of sweat in your boots, and turn your feet into fleshsicles. The best possible choice when you're sock shopping is wool, but some people seem to think that wool is scratchy and abrasive. Check out some of the higher-grade wool socks on the market, like those from SmartWool, or the merino wool offerings from Wigwam. They're as soft as any Egyptian cotton, and they won't hold a drop of moisture. If you find that you still can't handle wool, then find a good polypropylene sock that feels good, and buy 10 pairs. You can never have enough good socks!
Good boots are sometimes tough to justify for some people. After all, a quality pair of boots can set you back 200 bucks. This might seem steep, but have you seen what a new pair of feet is going for on E-bay nowadays?
I don't want to shill for any particular product (especially if the manufacturer isn't paying me), but it's pretty simple: buy Gore-Tex boots. When it comes to footwear, the folks at W.L. Gore have mastered waterproof/breathable technology. Several manufacturers make boots with Gore-Tex, and Gore oversees the production of every pair. You can be assured that any Gore-Tex boot is built better than anything else on the market. As an added bonus, if you ever do have any problems with a Gore-Tex boot, not only will the boot's manufacturer stand behind it, but so will the Gore folks. It's like having double insurance!
Problem #3 -- OK, I'm properly dressed head-to-toe...and I'm still freezing. What gives?
If you've made yourself impervious to the elements, walking around in your own little wicking, waterproof/breathable Fortress of Solitude, and you still find yourself turning blue, there are a couple of possible causes:
First, check your diet. Caloric intake has a direct impact on body temperature. Before going out in the cold, make sure you take in some quality calories. Simple carbohydrates, like sugars and starches, will give you quick energy and a rapid warm-up, but will also abandon you after an hour or so. Complex carbs are a better choice for energy and warmth. If you're on the go, throw a few PowerBars in your pockets. Munching on one every couple of hours will keep your metabolism in gear, keeping your body warm and toasty.
Second, as much as I hate to be the bearer of terrible news, limit your alcohol intake. My old man used to take wineskins full of brandy to Browns games in 20-below temperatures, claiming the booze kept him warm. And apparently it did, 'cause he was always warmer than me, and I limited myself to 50 or 60 beers. But this goes against the laws of biology; despite my dad's insistence, alcohol is not antifreeze. The more you drink, the more your metabolism is suppressed and the colder you get. As an added kick in the pants, alcohol also dehydrates you, leading to fatigue. Hit the sauce hard enough on an outdoor outing, and they'll find your body after the snow melts.
If all of this sounds confusing, it really isn't. Staying warm just requires a little common sense, and an awareness of the three basic layers you need to wear: a base layer that will move moisture away from your skin; an insulating layer that will trap warm air near your body; and a protective outer layer, or shell, that will repel wind and water. Put 'em all together, and you'll be equipped to stay out a little longer and enjoy winter a little bit more this year.
The Bull's Choice
Here are the top keep-you-warm products as selected by the crack Bullz-Eye Magazine staff, tested in a meat locker in Philly. (No, wait. That wasn't us...)
Bull's Choice Outerwear: Columbia Phase Shift Parka
The Phase Shift is a top-notch piece, with all the bells and whistles you'd expect to find in a high-end parka: waterproof/breathable fabric, zip-out fleece liner, underarm zippers for ventilation, power steering and cruise control. But what makes the Phase Shift unique is the
Outlast Temperature Regulation system. Outlast is a microcapsule polymer that reacts to heat. It actually absorbs and stores heat energy from your body. When it gets cold outside and your body temperature drops, Outlast transfers stored heat to your body. If that's not high-tech enough for you, this stuff actually works the other way, too: get heated up during strenuous activity, and Outlast will absorb and store excess heat, cooling you off. In short, this parka is smarter than you are. At around $250, the Phase Shift could be your best friend this winter.
Bull's Choice Boot: Rocky Bear Claw 2
Bear Claw boots are a staple of Rocky's hunting boot line, but the Bear Claw 2 is available in a great-looking brown full-grain leather, or a durable brown Cordura nylon. If you're stalking big game, you can get this boot in a number of camo patterns, but the brown versions will look right at home at a ballgame. A Gore-Tex liner, 1,000 grams of Thinsulate insulation, and a rugged Goodyear welt sole construction combine to make this boot almost bulletproof. Short of climbing Everest, the Bear Claw 2 will stand up to anything you can throw at it.
Bull's Choice Sock: Wigwam Merino Wool Rugged Hiker
This sock is the closest thing to perfect that you'll find in the sock world. It's a heavy-duty hiker, which means it's fairly thick and well padded, without being bulky. It's so well made that you could probably wear it without boots and it would still keep your feet warm. Constructed with over 70% high-grade merino wool, the Rugged Hiker will wick moisture away from your sweaty feet with the best of them. And you've never heard a sheep bitching about cold feet, have you?
Got a gear question? Go ahead and ask us anything. If we select your question to be answered in the next column, we'll give you a $50 gift certificate courtesy of Dick's Sporting Goods! Send your questions to:
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