Xtreme Xcitement between the sidelinez
02/01/2001
Codding Home / Sports Channel / Bullz-Eye Home
Aside from the five people who will actually waste an afternoon watching this weekend's Pro Bowl, the NFL season is over for most football fans. No more breathtaking Marshall Faulk highlight reels to watch every Sunday night. No more Randy Moss jump balls in the back corner of the end zone. No more idiotic mid-field celebrations for Terrell Owens, at least not until next year. So with baseball still a couple months away and the NBA sending me to the land of dreams every night, what does an official sports junkie like me have to look forward to?
How about some Alvin Harper and Scott Milanovich highlights?
Yes, those guys are still alive and still, believe it or not, playing professional football. And so are Russel Copeland, Tommy Maddox, Rashaan Shehee and Pepe Pearson. Mind you, they aren't playing for an NFL team any more. Instead, these former college stars and NFL stiffs have temporarily neglected their gas-pumping duties to answer the call of the XFL (insert obnoxiously loud music here). That's right, entrepreneur Vince McMahon, the "brains" behind the World Wrestling Federation, has lured hundreds of NFL failures to join his latest venture, the Extreme Football League. Eight teams, 10 weeks of "Extreme" football action, all brought to you by the wonderful people of the WWF, TNN, UPN and NBC Sports, and opening this Saturday, Feb. 4.
I'm not really sure what to make of this renegade football league. Anything headed by Vince "Mr. Gimmick" McMahon deserves to be scrutinized, as I'm sure the XFL will be. But this league could realistically become a big success with McMahon leading the way. We're talking about a guy who threw a handful of no-talent meatheads into a glorified boxing ring, gave them some flashy names, a few folding chairs and some half-naked women, and in the process created the most popular event on television. Then he added some soap opera-reject storylines and gave his stars their own corny taglines to add even more intrigue. And somehow it worked.
But I'm okay with wrestling. In fact, I've been known to catch a few "matches" every so often with my buddies. Of course, there has to be plenty of beer involved to get me to sit through that crap, but I have to admit that, in the right mood, the WWF actually is entertaining. But that's because you know -- or at least I know -- it's all phony. It's all an act and I guess there's a place for that. Hey, set a case of beer in front of me and I'll watch The Rock smack "Stone Cold" Steve Austin over the head with a surprisingly flimsy steel chair. And I'll probably enjoy it, at least for the first 10 minutes or so.
But I can only take so much of the wrestling mentality. I can only take so much of McMahon and his brand of entertainment. And I can't take it on the football field. Well, I don't think I'll be able to, at least. After all, I'm going to watch it. I've got to watch it, partially because it's my job to check it out, but also because (and I'm not proud of it) the XFL has perked my curiosity, as I'm sure it's perked yours. Don't forget, every single WWF event sells out. Every one of them. And the XFL will probably sell out too, at least in Los Angeles, New York and Chicago. Because if there's one thing McMahon knows how to do, it's market his product and make it appealing to the fan base he's aiming for. Check out these team names: the New York/New Jersey Hitmen, the Orlando Rage, the Memphis Maniax, the Birmingham Bolts, the Chicago Enforcers, the L.A. Xtreme, the Las Vegas Outlaws and the San Francisco Demons. You can bet those are exactly the kinds of names that'll bring wrestling fans to the football stadiums, but do we really need another pro football league praising hitmen, maniacs and outlaws, not to mention terrible spelling? The NFL already does that.
But McMahon knew it would take more than some beefed-up team names and the WWF logo to sell football tickets. So he tinkered with the NFL rules a bit, and this is where that wrestling mentality really comes into play. First, there are no fair catches in the XFL, making for "the most exciting fourth down in football." However, the punt returner is protected by a five-yard "halo," meaning a member of the kicking team cannot come within five yards of the returner until he catches the ball. Then he can knock the snot out of him. Additionally, the kicking team can't cross the line of scrimmage until the ball is kicked and, here's the best part, any punt traveling more than 25 yards past the original line of scrimmage is a live ball, meaning either team can recover for possession. Basically, all of that just means no sane player in the XFL wants to return punts because, no matter how many psycho special teams players are slobbering down your neck, you have to catch the ball - there are no fair catches and, if you just let the ball drop, you'll lose possession. But if you catch it, you could lose your head. Tough choice.
There also are no extra point kicks. Instead, after a touchdown the scoring team must run a play from the two-yard line, and if they reach the end zone it's good for one point. Plus, the clock runs for these conversion attempts so a turnover can be returned by the defense for one point. Hey, any way to get those limp-wristed kickers off the field, right? Along with a few other rule changes (only one foot needed inbounds for a reception, shorter play clock, bump-and-run allowed downfield) McMahon has managed to sensationalize the already-brutal game of football, and it'll probably put a ton of green in his crowded pockets.
If he doesn't necessarily have NFL talent, McMahon at least has some NFL names scattered throughout his league at below-NFL prices. Along with the players mentioned above, guys like Lashon Johnson, Kurt Gouveia, Jim Druckenmiller, Ken Oxendine and former Heisman winner Rashaan Salaam have found homes in the XFL. But there aren't any millionaires here: kicking specialists make roughly $35,000 a year, quarterbacks will see a base of approximately $50,000 and all other players will get a base salary of around $45,000. Plus, every active player gets an additional $2,500 bonus for every game his team wins, and all active players on the championship team receive a $25,000 bonus. Not bad for a renegade football league. And do the names Dick Butkus and Jesse Ventura ring a bell? Of course they do, and having Ventura in the broadcast booth and Butkus in the league's front office as "director of football competition" (whatever the hell that means) just adds to the XFL's growing appeal.
Like I said, my curiosity's been perked. In fact, I actually joined a free XFL fantasy league just to get the true Xperience. On my 20-man roster, I only recognize 10 names, but I've got some ringers: Maddox, Casey Weldon, Pearson, Oxendine, Charles Jordan, Harper and Gouveia. And being the fantasy nut that I am, you bet your ass I'll try to win. Hell, I may not know half the guys on my team but that won't stop me from rooting for them every Saturday and Sunday.
In the Bullz-Eye
The Toronto Raptors. With star Vince Carter out thanks to a cranky knee, the Raptors need every single player on their active roster to step it up. Toronto currently is smack-dab in the middle of the Eastern Conference playoff race, but an extended absence for Carter could quickly knock the Raptors out of contention. It may be early but don't underestimate the effect a mid-season losing streak would have on this team.