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The One AM Radio: This Too Will Pass Label: Dangerbird Records Released: 2007

I’ve been fascinated by the advances that have been made in medical science over the past few years. Everyone is always studying this and that when it comes to the human body. I mean, Dr. Atkins was on to something but then he fell and hit his head and died. Damn, that’s ironic. At least, I think it is. (Editor’s note: it’s not.) Anyway, I wonder if anyone has ever conducted a study to see what percentage of runners get hit by cars as compared to fat-asses such as myself that just sit around all day and listen to records. It would seem that I’m probably a bit more likely to outlive the average runner in my safe little cocoon of speakers and other various noisemaking gear.

Life just isn’t fair.

So what in the hell is the point of this, you might ask? Well, I’m trying to conduct a little study of my own. I’m basically trying to figure out if my musical tastes are somehow tied to my metabolism. I really love listening to slow and mellow music. When I put on a Kings of Convenience record – or this album by the One AM Radio – my heart rate goes down and I feel instantly relaxed. The downside is that I never burn any calories whatsoever because I’m so warm and cozy that I don’t ever feel like moving. Wow. Could it be that my musical tastes are slowly killing me? Is listening to mellow records the equivalent of smoking a pack of cigarettes a day? Holy shit, the implications here are stunning. What if, one day, this study is actually conducted, and millions of tubby, sleepy people start suing Sigur Ros like they were Phillip Morris? What if various subgenres of metal become good for you?

I don’t care what some skinny, head-banging, jogging doctor spouts off to me when my doomsday scenario comes true. I’m going to continue to ingest This Too Will Pass like a Philly cheesesteak that was washed down with a pint of Scotch. There are elements of this record that remind me of the Notwist and the Album Leaf – all of which are good things. Also, these cats are apparently from Yale; hence, they were smart enough to hire some of the best publicists around, and it’s paying off, because many of the music geeks filling the blogosphere are writing about the One AM Radio like the band cured obesity. Which, in all honesty, they may want to get a jump on, if only for their own financial well-being.