|Margot & The Nuclear So & So’s:
The Dust Of Retreat Label: Artemis Records
Okay. While we’re still in the getting-to-know-you phase of our relationship, you may hear me say on occasion that a particular record is 1) the best record I’ve heard this year, 2) the greatest record ever, or 3) definitely in my top five albums of all time. And so on and so forth. Well, this record may be all of the above, or at least I feel that way right now. I could (and probably will) change my mind tomorrow, but for today, this record is my universe. I heard everybody talking about these guys at SXSW this year, and I missed them. Then, when I got back to Nashville, I fucking missed them again. How irritating is that? Always the last to know. That’s me. Boo-hoo.
Anycrap, back to this record. It’s incredible. I can’t possibly muster up enough adjectives to describe this band. Actually, I’m not that bright, so I can’t muster up many adjectives period. Fuck, I call chicks “dude,” so you can’t expect that much from me. Melodically, this record is a breath of fresh air, and the arrangements are also striking. Lyrically, I’m stunned that a rock band is this in-touch with who they are, considering it’s their debut album. I mean, Jesus, they must sit around and read WH Auden or Dylan Thomas to one another. The track entitled “Skeleton Key” starts off with the line: “I did a sick, sick thing to my love.” If that doesn’t grab your attention, go back to emptying trashcans at your shitty fast-food job, you retard. Sorry, I’m like a mother hen with this band. If anyone so much as looks at them funny, I’ll kick their ass. I am totally serious when I say the world would be a better place if everyone were into this band. Wars would end, and pussy would grow on trees. Actually, that’s kinda gross, but you get the picture.
Oh god, I hope my insufficient review doesn’t deter you from dropping everything you may be doing at this very moment to buy this album. Seriously, I’d better start seeing this record selling out all over the country. I want to turn on CNN (or Fox for you non-thinkers) and see: Breaking News... “Yes, that’s right Tom. The Margot and the Nuclear So & So’s debut album is now the best selling record in the universe of all time.” And then they’ll cut to Paul McCartney and he’ll be all like, “Bloody hell. I fancied myself a pretty good writer of pop tunes but this band makes me question my entire career.” That’s right. Whoa. I’m sweaty. I have to stop writing this now, before I get too carried away.