Online Dating 101: How to Ensure That Your Conversation Carries Through to a Date


woman with laptop

Did you know that around 49 million singles have tried their hand at online dating? While it might once have appeared to be quite distant and cold compared to more organic meetups, around one-fifth of committed relationships now start on the internet, with 17 percent of married couples having a dating site to thank for finding their soulmate.

However, men who have given online dating a go often discover that it’s a little trickier than they anticipated. While getting matches might seem like the hard part on the surface, the real difficulty can be turning that initial attraction into the sort of communication that could lead to a date.

So how should you go about it? Here are three top tips from the experts!

Find commonalities

When it comes to online dating, something a lot of men struggle with is knowing how to start a conversation. If you go for small talk, you worry you’ll be repeating the same questions she’s already heard ten times over since logging on; if you go for something a little more out there, you risk sounding awkward or like you’re trying too hard. The simple solution? Take a look through your match’s bio and see what it is she’s written about herself: her hobbies and interests, her job, her pets. By including this, she’s making it clear that these are things that are important to her and that she feels happy and open talking about them.

Ask her questions

Almost every man who’s used a dating app or site will find that they’ve been ghosted at some point. ‘What is ghosting?’, we hear you ask and, for the uninitiated, we’ll explain. This 21st-century dating trend occurs when someone you’ve been speaking to online inexplicably cuts contact. There are lots of reasons why you might find yourself on the receiving end, but one of the most common is because the person you’ve matched with loses interest. One way to avoid this is by providing sufficiently stimulating conversation, and asking questions is a must. While some people feel awkward and intrusive delving into another person’s private life, you need to remember that the aim of the game is to get to know someone so that you can work out whether you have a genuine connection and wish to date. Plus, it creates a nice conversational rhythm to get you into the swing of things.

Don’t jump straight to asking her out

Last but not least, it’s important to remember that the female experience of online dating is quite different to the male one. That’s because women are more likely to feel vulnerable about meeting a stranger, so recognise this and don’t jump straight into asking her out. Instead, give your match the chance to get to know you better, and see it as a good opportunity to find out more about her too before you commit to anything. The golden rule should be to wait at least 48 hours. This way, she also knows that you’re not just making the same blanket proposal to every woman you meet online, but are investing time and effort into getting to know her as an individual.

Isn’t it time you upped your online dating game? With these three top tips, it couldn’t be easier!


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